33. it snuck up on me.
amd it's just going to be a normal day.
(i guess i'm an adult now).
i have had the weirdest two months of my life.
not the hardest, just really weird and foggy.
i have either been recovering from a
stone removal surgery because it was too big to pass,
or trying to pass one in major pain.
it's been a fog of pain pills and exasperation.
usually i would have fun plans, i love bdays-
but i forgot to make any.
i think i'll just go thrifting,
but i do that most days anyway.
and grant is leaving on a business trip.
we said we'll just pretend my bday is this weekend,
and we'll celebrate with friends then.
and that's just fine with me.
next monday i have a third
(and final, fingers crossed) stone removal.
everytime i have an appointment to have them blasted,
the stone drops and we have to do surgery instead.
weird, weird few months.
i haven't really worked. i have watched a lot of movies.
sounds great, right?
nope. it gets pretty boring.
and i'm already prone to isolation,
but this has really made it extra bad.
grant requested i not be a debbie downer
on what should be a happy, non-dramatic day.
oh, and i should be launching this year's
but honestly, i can't handle it until my
hospital visits are complete.
so that's on hold- until i can pull my head out.
in defiance of the no debbie downer rule,
can longingly say that
all i want for my bday this year is this?
that's not too much to ask, is it?
(from my favorite blog i can't understand: ledansla)
and finally, in the words of samantha baker:
no, i didn't expect to wake up transformed,
i just thought turning 
would be so major that
i would wake up with an improved
mental state that would show on my face.
all that shows is that i don't have
any sort of a tan left.